Dating a co-worker will lead to awkward office encounters

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Tweet For me, dating is like mining for gold.

I picture myself as a 19th century pioneer woman, manifesting my destiny in the Wild West. I'm out at the river panning for gold, carefully eyeing every last piece of dirt, hoping to find something unusually shiny.

But just like you'd never pan for gold in a cornfield, you shouldn't be searching for your future lover in the next cubicle.

There's a laundry list of reasons as to why dating someone you work with is, frankly, a disaster.

I doubt any of us can say we've had a boyfriend or girlfriend who never annoyed us. Be it their habit of chewing their nails or their impatience for your phone calls, to subject yourself to someone you can't even avoid at work isn't the best choice for personal space.

While it doesn't usually seem like it, your workplace can pose as a temporary haven during a bad fight with your lover. It serves as a great excuse as to why you can't pick up their phone calls or answer their instant messages. How exactly will you avoid their advances if they can physically see you? You won't.

And let's face it. Everyone breaks up.

OK, maybe not everyone. But while we're all on the quest (big or small) to find that potential mate, we sift through a whole lot of sand and rocks before we finally find our piece of gold.

At first glance, that cutie a few desks down may appear like Prince Charming, but after spending both nights and days with him, his magnetizing manner can quickly morph into a daily nuisance.

We all remember those days as teenagers - irritating our parents, getting grounded, then having to spend all of our time passing them in the house, constantly grinding our teeth at the mere glance of their presence.

This exact same feeling can parallel into your workplace scene following a break up with a co-worker.

Suddenly, those sweet, adoring eyes your lover used to send you from across the room will be transformed into lasers intended to pierce through your skin like a paper shredder.

And what if that break up is - gasp - your fault? Gossip flies fast in the workplace, and before you can say "romance," your boss, your boss's boss and the company owner have heard about how you're the scum of the earth.

You also have to expect not only the break up, but other "charming" events may likely be revealed by your past significant other. That time you read her poetry in bed, or that time you bawled like a child during "The Notebook" are fun facts even your work secretary will be thinking when she sees you.

Of course, there are exceptions. Let's say you have trust issues. Dating a coworker can be great for that, because you can constantly stalk - I mean, watch - them at work and know they aren't lying about their whereabouts. This is something you have to consider when you yourself are being pursued by a co-worker. Are they really just control freaks who constantly need to make sure you're within their arms' reach?

And just as relationships with co-workers are a bad idea, so is the great ol' "friends with benefits" scheme. Maybe he does look a little bit like Josh Hartnett, but you just don't feel ready for a relationship (or, worse yet, he doesn't). Don't go throwing yourself in his bed.

There are plenty of the exact same B-list celebrity look-alikes at the bar down the street. That awkward "Hi, we hooked up last night, now let's talk about (insert work place here)" conversation is easily avoidable.

Your workplace is part of your own identity, and by meshing it with someone who has the same, you face boundaries you typically wouldn't.

It's always refreshing to be with someone who can teach you something, and it's going to be quite a feat to be interestingly informed by his or her job when you do the exact same thing.

Hey, at least you can always talk about work.

When she's not reading Cosmopolitan, Thea Neal can be reached at nealthea@msu.edu.

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